SHOWING APPRECIATION

Good day sister. How are you doing?

Recently, the Holy Spirit has been showing me things that ladies do that could easily make it harder for their husbands to love them as they ought to. This is not in anyway saying such husbands shouldn't love all the same, though.

Number one of course is unsubmissiveness. I understand what my friend was trying to say when he said "a man loves those UNDER him". Of course, the woman is not UNDER a man; she is a joint heir of salvation. However, we learn in 1 Peter 3: 3-4 that a wife's beauty should be of the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very valuable in God's eyes.
Verse 6 gives Sarah as an example of a submissive wife. I think God has a very big sense of humour. I wouldn't have used Sarah as an example of a submissive wife based on the account we were given in Genesis. However, she was cited as an example. That tells me that submission is more of the heart than what we do, though what we do reflects what's in our hearts.

Another thing, which is the focus of this post, is the lack of appreciation. I think a lot of wives are guilty of this in one way or the other. We get so fixated on what we want, how we want it and when we want it that we don't realize that our husbands are trying to do something.
For example, a man sacrifices a huge amount of his income to buy his wife a gift. She sees the gift, possibly gives him a half-hearted "Thank you" then goes on to tell him what her friend's husband gave her or even begins to find faults with what he bought.
In another case, the woman may have been complaining about how the man doesn't help around the house. One day, he tries to wash the plates but doesn't do it the way the woman wants. Instead of appreciating his gesture, she begins to lecture him on how she wants him to wash plates. In my opinion, the first time he washes the plate is not the time to lecture him. And frankly, if his way isn't unsafe, maybe you're the one that needs to learn new ways of washing plates, lol...

Don't be too fixated on your own ways or on things that aren't working well to notice your husband's efforts...

PS: I know some men need to show their wives' appreciation too. It's just that I've noticed this trait more in women. However, brothers, if you need to make adjustments, please feel free...