"And he said, A certain man had two sons: And the
younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that
falleth to me. And he divided unto them his living."
Luke 15: 11-12
I'll like to talk about three prodigals. There has been a
lot of focus on the son that asked for his inheritance and wasted it. I'll like
to focus on the father in this post.
My first question was - Where was the wife/mother? I am
asking primarily because she was amazingly silent. I do believe, unlike many
others, that men can raise kids "alone" just like women can, if they
have to. Just like single mothers, single fathers can rely on women in their
support system to raise kids. There is nothing in the woman's DNA that makes
her more likely to succeed as a single mother than a man would succeed as a
single father. That excuse of a man remarrying an EVIL woman because he needs a
WIFE to help him raise his kids doesn't fly, in my opinion. Please feel free to
share your views on this.
My next question to Dad is this - "Why did you
divide the inheritance just because the son asked?"
I believe the father could have probed further to
understand the ROOT CAUSE of the request. I'll soon give my thoughts on why I
think the son made the request. I think a little probing from the Father may
have saved them all the heartache. I think he could have learnt was the real
issue was and improved his relationship with his TWO sons.
Interestingly, the father did not go looking for his son
in the far country. He stayed in his lane and let God bring his son back to him
at the appointed time. I believe if you've explored every godly avenue to keep
the prodigals from leaving and they still choose to go, LET THEM GO! If the
relationship is God-ordained, HE will work things in your favour and will bring
them back at HIS appointed time. Stay in your place of assignment and let God
deal with the prodigal. If God (not your emotions) is leading you to seek the
prodigal in the far country (like Hosea), please do. If not, stay in your lane.
Just make sure that it is God, not your emotions or the opinions of (helpful)
others that is leading you.
The father did not stay paralysed in one place while the
younger son was away. He wasn't in an infirmary or broke or whatever when the
son returned. He continued running his business and his household. Someone
trusting God for the return of a prodigal needs to hear this. Pray for your
prodigal but please, don't stop living. THEY made the choice to leave, YOU don't
have to stop living because of their selfish choices. You can cry when you miss
them but please don't let them come back and find you either in the same state
they met you or in a worse condition...KEEP MOVING!
While the younger son was away, the father still kept
watch. I doubt that he spent all day sitting by a window, waiting for his son
to return. However, he still looked at periodically. You need to still keep
watch for your prodigal. You can choose a time daily to pray for your prodigal.
The father celebrated his prodigal son's return. He
showed his son that the love he (the father) had for him (the son) could cover
a multitude of sins. I don't believe the prodigal son knew his father's love
was stronger than his sin while he was in the far country. When God brings back
your prodigal, you need to let them know that your love is stronger than their
sin (which they should have repented from and FORSAKEN). If they are still
continuing in the sin, they are still PRODIGALS! It's not yet time to celebrate.
They need to come back to their senses and return "home" before any
celebration can start. If they are still justifying their selfish choices, they
are still PRODIGALS!
The father was sensitive enough to observe that his older
son was not so excited about his younger son's return. Thankfully, he probed
this time. The older son's response is the basis for my conclusion on why I
think the younger son left in the first place. I think the father did not share
his heart with his sons. Neither of them knew the extent of his love for them.
One of them rebelled and left home; the other one served harder in order to
gain the affection he desired.
I'll end with a message first to fathers (biological and
non-biological) and then to all of us. Fathers, let your children know that
your love for them is unconditional. If your love is conditional, you need to
let God work on your heart. You are a manipulator if your love is only
available when your children meet your conditions. If your love is
unconditional, you need to communicate that. Your words and actions will let
them know if you love them for who they are OR for what they do. This does not
mean that you shouldn't discipline them when they err; just let them know when
you're disciplining them that it's a love-based action.
To the rest of us I say, ensure your love is
unconditional. If your love is conditional, you need to let God work on your
heart. You are a manipulator if your love is only available when the other
person meets your conditions. If your love is unconditional, you need to
communicate that. Your words and actions will let them know if you love them
for who they are OR for what they do. This does not mean that you shouldn't
stay in an abusive/one-sided relationship; just let them know that their
actions are hurting you. If you can't take it anymore, let them know when
you're leaving that it's a love-based decision. Let God guide your decision to
stay or to leave.
Enjoy your day.
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