THIS FAIRYTALE IDOL

 *Warning: Long Post Ahead*
Good day. How are you doing?
I remember wondering why Angela Bassett (I hope I got that right?) didn't marry Larry Fishbourne in "Akeelah and The Bee". I thought that was the perfect ending. Somewhere in the corner of my mind, I felt that every woman should have some romance and somehow, the knight in shining armour would come and complete her.
mariedLet me quickly state that I believe marriage is honorable and can be a beautiful thing when done right. I am a bit concerned, though, about the notion that a woman is incomplete without a man. I can tell you that I first learnt that from the fairy tales I read as a child - Snow White and the seven dwarves, Cinderella (or Chinda Ella Babalola, as we've been taught by Eketi Aime Ette) and Sleeping Beauty etc. They all got married and "lived happily after" (?)
Imagine my shock when I started reading the Bible and I met Tamar, the lady that married Er(ror?), the son of Judah, who was perhaps the most godly man in her land. I'm sure they had a fairytale wedding. Only God knows how wicked Er was...God said He, the Almighty, slew Er. So, I know there are sons of Belial among the sons of Judah...Then she got passed on to Onan, who was equally wicked enough to get himself killed by the Almighty...You may want to look up 'onanism', that came from Onan, a son of Judah...Then the family suspected that it was Tamar (or her spirit husband/children) that was/were killing their sons (no, it had nothing to do with their wickedness...)
Then they quickly used 'sense' to put her away...She was to die childless and destitute. I wish I could say it was God that gave Tamar the idea on how to deal with Judah and his family. The truth is, I sincerely don't know who gave her the idea. What stood out for me, though, was that when God settled Tamar's matter, NO Prince Charming came to marry her and roll away the "reproach of her singleness". Through sons born in 'embarassing' circumstances, Tamar found herself in My Saviour's lineage...I've written a bit about Tamar's 'embarassing' story; it's on the Hephzibah's Musings blog.
Then I met Hagar. After the untidy arrangement with Abram and Sarai, I didn't read of a Prince Charming coming along to sweep her off her feet and help her raise her son. It was the Lord Almighty that was with the boy as he grew. I didn't read that Hagar remarried or had a lover that helped her raise her son (kudos to the men that step up, though).
Then I met Martha. I didn't read about her husband or sugar daddy. Yet she had a house where she, Mary and Lazarus lived. I didn't hear Jesus casting out the "Incubus" that caused Mary and Martha to remain unmarried or the generational curse(s) that made Martha, Mary and Lazarus remain single beyond the 'magical' age of 30 (Please, can someone advise on why 30 is the threshold, particularly for ladies?)
Am I saying marriage is not important? Not really. I also met married people in the Bible who did great things. However, a good number of them did not "live happily ever after" because they married "perfect" spouses. They had to obtain promises through faith and patience just like you and I. In fact, we are admonished to follow the examples of those who, through faith and patience, obtained the promise.
Paul's submission about singleness and marriage in 1 Corinthians 7 are VERY instructive.
"Now to the unmarried[a] and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion."
1 Corinthians 7: 8-9
If so, why are we blaming "Incubus" and "Sucubus" for delaying marital destinies? My people, my people, we need to be careful so that somebody will not call a dog a monkey and we'll just be following blindly. Let's not make marriage into an idol. It is this idolatry that is causing many problems.
Oh, and I heard today about a "sisto" that refused to go with her husband on the trip to Jerusalem because her body is the temple of the Most High. I'm not sure how they settled her matter but if you and her are in the same category, please read 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 CAREFULLY! There's a blog post dedicated to this matter.
Let me go back and face my work. I trust you're keeping well. As you've got to the end, please reward yourself with some cold water from your fridge. heart emoticon heart emoticon
Have a restful evening.